September sees the start of a new school term. For many children and young people this means a return to a new school year. This might be familiar to them, as they may be returning to the same school or college but for others, it will bring new excitement and challenges as they start at a new school or college.
Naturally, this causes a lot of different feelings including excitement and anxiety. The jump from year 6 to year 7, for example, can be particularly nerve wracking not just for young people, but also their parents and carers. In addition, children and young people may be feeling under pressure particularly when it comes to coursework, revision and exams. There therefore needs to be a transition period, where children/young people can adjust and settle into a new routine. This won’t always be a smooth or straightforward transition as they try to navigate and adapt to the change. In this blog, we have included some tips to help with this adjustment.
Tips
To return to learning, whether that be at school, college or university, preparation and organisation is key. Talking and listening to children and young people is a big part of this to understand how they are feeling and trying to calm any uncertainties they may be experiencing. It is important to reassure them that it is normal to feel anxious or nervous, and most people would feel the same way. Listen to any other concerns that they may have and check in with them after their first day/week to see if those feelings of anxiety or nerves have reduced.
Other ways to enhance preparation is to familiarise them with their new surroundings – looking at school websites and discussing transport to/from school if this has significantly changed from the previous year. Familiarity is important as it helps people feel secure.
As a parent/carer, if you do have concerns about your child’s mental health, it is important to have early conversations when you notice that something isn’t quite right. The NSPCC state that the following could be signs of mental health issues in children:
- sudden mood and behaviour changes
- self-harming
- unexplained physical changes, such as weight loss or gain
- sudden poor academic behaviour or performance
- sleeping problems
- changes in social habits, such as withdrawal or avoidance of friends and family.
They state that being attentive to a child or young person’s mood and behaviour is important so that parents/carers and other people regularly involved in their life (such as other family members), recognise changes quickly and address them. One of the main concerns for anyone suffering with ill mental health is the fear of not being taken seriously or being dismissed. So, it is crucial that there is open dialogue and that regular check-ins are a normal part of day-to-day life by asking people about their feelings and experiences. Set time aside to ask about someone’s day and use active listening to demonstrate that you are paying attention to what they are saying. Active listening means listening without judgement and letting the person say what they want to say without interrupting them. Show that you are listening by responding to what they say – e.g. they may be looking for some advice.
Young Minds state that many children and young people find it easier to talk while doing an activity. They have numerous activities listed on their website including:
- Playing a ball game or having a kick about
- Baking
- Creating something together
- Drawing cartoons of each other
- Indoor picnic
- Dancing
- Walking or going for a drive
- Drawing or colouring
- Yoga
The above are designed to be 20-minute activities, but there are also longer activities available on the website.
Young Minds also provide a list of conversation starters which includes general questions such as “how are you feeling?” to more serious questions such as “what was the biggest problem you had today?”. There are also fun questions like “what’s your favourite thing about school and why?” or “what’s your favourite song at the moment? Would I like it?”, as well as encouraging statements such as “if you talk to me about what is worrying you, I can do my best to help” and “you can talk to me, I’m here for you”.
Parents and Carers
To look after children, parents and carers also need to take care of themselves. Being a parent means there are always going to be challenges and responsibilities to juggle. The summer holidays are a prime example of this as the school holidays can be a stressful time as parents/carers juggle work with spending quality time with children and young people, making sure that childcare is in place and that there is time for activities and days out, so that children and young people are having fun and are stimulated. It is therefore important to look after yourself and focus on your own mental health and wellbeing. Try to put good strategies in place that not only support your wellbeing now but also helps you when any unforeseen circumstances occur. Adopt healthy routines for sleep, diet and exercise and focus on your self-care – what is important for you? It might be an uninterrupted break each day, or it might be journalling. Whatever your self-care goals are, ensure they remain a priority.
References
- https://learning.nspcc.org.uk/child-health-development/child-mental-health
- https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/how-to-talk-to-your-child-about-mental-health/#Conversationstarterstosupportyou